My pal D-Mac read The New York Times piece about spending 36 hours in Philadelphia, and decided to offer a more realistic take of what that time might look like:

Still, the piece might make out-of-towners think a Philadelphian’s life is all trips to the Barnes and Philadelphia History Museums and an endless supply of donuts and fried chicken, shoveled into our mouths as quickly as possible. (Okay, that second part is kind of true.) The Times’ 36 Hours in Philadelphia is adequate. But here’s a (slightly fictionalized and compressed) 36 Hours in Real Philadelphia, another helpful public service from your ol’ friend Dan McQuade. Don’t worry, I am lame and mainstream enough that most of the places on this list could end up in the Times the next time it profiles Philadelphia in 2016.

The piece is educational for Philadelphians, too.  For instance: I had no idea that Oscar’s served food.  I hope that doesn’t make me an alcoholic.